One Toe Out (A Complicated Love Story) Read online

  “I guess,” Lillian said. “Would you like some water or something to eat?”

  “Yeah. Some pudding would be nice.” Her mom had been fussing over her ever since the ambulance had brought her into the hospital.

  Lillian eyes widened with surprise.

  “I’m serious their pudding is good.”

  “Okay, I’ll run down to the cafeteria and get some for you.”

  As soon as her mother left, Simone closed her eyes. It had been an exhausting last couple of days. Fortunately the bullet didn’t hit any organs or artery. She had lost a lot of blood, enough for a transfusion. Lillian had provided her with the blood. It was her way of apologizing again for not listening to her daughter. And the best thing of all was that the baby had survived.

  “Hey baby.”

  Simone opened her eyes, Kirk was looking down at her.

  “Hey.”

  He leaned down and kissed her gently on the forehead before sitting in the seat her mother just left. He grabbed her hand and squeezed it, Simone had felt better.

  She hesitated, then said, “J.T. called.”

  His grip tightened on her hand, but his voice didn’t give anything away. “What did he want?” he asked easily.

  She told him about the deal that was made so that Marcella wouldn’t have to go to trail.

  “Are you surprised?”

  “Naw. Then everything would come out about J.T. she couldn’t do that, it made sense for her to avoid all that. She got five years and more than likely she’ll be out in two. It’s funny how they spun it. That she was always in love with J.T. and she couldn’t take our marriage any more. And she just wanted to talk to me, the gun was an accident. And it worked. Don’t forget about the money J.T. had given her.”

  He whistled softly. “Yeah, I set up the account. Twenty-five million, that’s a lot of hush money. At least you don’t sound bitter.”

  “I’ve had time to think about everything and to recognize my part in this all. I’m not saying that she was right for shooting me…but I never should’ve married him. Anyway J.T. has been really generous with me. He agreed to a divorce, and fifteen million was deposited in my account.” She had accumulated almost twenty million dollars over the course of her short marriage.

  “But he gave Marcella more than you.”

  Simone rolled her eyes. “Yeah, first of all she has a lot more dirt on him than I do and he knows that you and I are going to get married. So he knows that I’m going to be taken care of. He was pretty calm when you told him that you can’t work for him anymore.”

  “He knew that he and I can’t go back, sometimes people can, but not this time,” he said wisely.

  “I hate that I was involved in such a shitty situation.”

  “It wasn’t your fault. If the situation was offered to anybody else, they would’ve accepted it too. And it might’ve gone down differently.”

  “He’s going to keep playing,” she said. “He figures that his secret is safe and nothing’s changed.”

  “Except you’re getting a divorce. Do you think he’ll ever remarry?”

  “I don’t know. I just wish that he’d be honest. Tell everybody that he’s gay. He’ll be an inspiration to other people struggling with their sexuality. And if the NFL makes it difficult for him, he should sue their asses off. He has a right to play just like everyone else.”

  Kirk shrugged. “Everything you said is true. We’ll just have to wait and see.”

  There was a knock on the door. J.T. stuck his head in her room. “May I come in?”

  “Come on in.”

  “I’m sorry about what happened. I never would’ve thought this would have happened.”

  “Neither of us did.” She waited expectedly for him to continue. “I guess our situation was a little too good to be true,” she said then laughed bitterly.

  “Well, you know the saying…”

  “Yeah. So I just heard on the news that the NFL banned any type of discrimination to the players based on their sexual orientation. So do you think you’ll come out now?”

  J.T. shrugged and Simone saw the struggle on his face. “I don’t know. It’s not that easy, it’ll be like I’ll be doing a one hundred eighty degree change. And just because the NFL says they disapprove of it, it doesn’t mean that all my teammates and the people I play against will respect me,” he said while imaging the blitzing he’d get on the field and the possible change in attitude from his friends. “Besides discrimination against race in the workplace is illegal but yet it still happens, and don’t get me started on sexual harassment.”

  “But those victims go to court and sue.”

  “Yeah, they have a hard time proving their case and a lot of time they’re ostracized and their lives are never the same.”

  “Why do I get the feeling that you’re not ready to come out yet?” she asked giving him a wry grin.

  “Because you’re right, I’m not ready yet.”

  “Well, it’s a big decision and you’re right, you have to do it when you want to,” Simone said reasonably. “Nobody wants to be pushed out of the closet.”

  “Yeah, maybe it’s better to do it one toe at a time,” J.T. joked. “Christian is here, he wants to apologize to you.”

  Kirk who had been sitting quietly observing them, shook his head. “No!”

  “That’s sweet, but he doesn’t have to.”

  “He knows that, but he wants to put all this behind him and he’s sorry for his behavior.”

  “So you two are staying together?”

  “Yeah,” J.T. sheepishly admitted.

  “You love him, huh?”

  “Yeah, probably just as much as you love Kirk.”

  “Cool. But how are you guys gonna make it work? Is he going to live with you?”

  “No, he’s back in his apartment. And he’ll stay over occasionally.”

  “Will you re-marry?”

  “No, unless it’s Christian.”

  “I am happy for you,” Simone said.

  “Same for you.” He called to Christian who was standing outside the door.

  A contrite Christian strolled in. He gasped at seeing Simone in the bed. He stood next to J.T. “I just wanted you to know how sorry I am, my behavior was inexcusable and I’m very sorry.”

  “Thanks Christian I appreciate it.”

  “I guess we better get going,” J.T. said. He bent down and kissed Simone on the forehead. “Let me know if you need anything and I really mean it,” he whispered in her ear.

  “I know you do. Love you,” she said and she did, even after everything that happened. She loved him like a brother.

  Just as J.T. and Christian were leaving the room, Lillian was returning with a tray of food.

  She waited until J.T. and Christian were down the hall before she announced: “Okay guys, who’s ready to plan a wedding?”

  Thank you for purchasing my e-book.

  READ EXCERPTS FROM MY OTHER TITLES – NOW ON SALE:

  MY HUSBAND & MY WIFEY - $.99

  Barrett McKenzie laughed loudly; it started in her heart and erupted into a blast of playfulness. Sierra, her best friend of fifteen years, grinned at her. “You’re too crazy girl, keep pulling stunts like that and those people are going to fire you. That’s for real.” Barrett sat back in her chair and crossed her legs. She and Sierra were sharing their weekly lunch at their favorite restaurant.

  Sierra grinned. “I know. I’ll try to behave myself. So what are you getting Tavis for his birthday?” she asked.

  Barrett shrugged while taking a bite from her orange glazed salmon. “I don’t know. I’ve been going crazy trying to think of something.” And she had been, for the last three months, as soon as the reminder popped up on her BlackBerry. Her husband had every gadget created and was a bigger clothes whore than she. So those gifts were out. She had a gift in mind, but it was so unusual, so different, and so unlike anything she had given him, that she had skirted away from it…until now.

  “What about
a spa day?”

  “Nope, did that for the last two years in a row.”

  “Okay. What about a trip?”

  “I’ve already sent him to Vegas, Miami and the Dominican Republic.” As a successful lawyer, she was able to be generous with her husband.

  “Well, ain’t he the lucky man,” Sierra drawled.

  “I kinda have an idea,” Barrett sheepishly admitted.

  Sierra ran her finger through a dollop of butter. “What?” she asked before licking the butter off and she nearly choked when she heard her friend’s response.

  Barrett glanced around to ensure that no one was listening, fortunately everyone within hearing distance was engrossed in conversation or focused on their food. “I was thinking,” Barrett repeated softly, “about Tavis and me having a threesome.”

  “What the—” Sierra vigorously shook her head. “No Barrett, don’t do that. Why would you do something so stupid?”

  “He’s been hinting around.”

  Sierra placed her hands, palms down, on the table and glared at her long-time friend. “So! Let him hint all he wants, hell let him take an ad out in the newspaper, don’t do it!”

  Barrett took a deep breath, while Sierra wasn’t entirely straitlaced and proper, she did at one time carry on a three-year affair with a married man, she could be quite prissy when the mood hit her. “But I kinda want to,” she whispered.

  “Oh lawd!” Sienna yelled and Barrett covered her face with her hands and slumped in her seat. She hadn’t planned on telling Sierra her plans, it just slipped out and now that it did, she regretted it.

  “Can you not shout? I don’t need everybody knowing my business,” Barrett hissed, as she straightened up and removed her hands from her face.

  “Why do you want to invite a woman—it is a woman isn’t it?” she asked and Barrett confirmed that it was. “Why would you invite an outsider into your marriage?”

  “We’ve been married for ten years. Things are getting stale.”

  “Shit! Don’t be talking about your marriage as though it was a loaf of bread. Have a baby! That should freshen up things.”

  Barrett sighed. “I don’t want a baby. We’re happy just the way we are.” A baby took a lot of energy, something she didn’t want to exert right now. Although for the past few years, Tavis had been begging her to start a family. “We’re just bored in the bedroom, everything else is fine.”

  “And you really think that an extra pussy will magically make all your problems go away?”

  “No, not at all,” Barrett lied. She did hope that it would make Tavis appreciate her more and see her as adventurous once he got the threesome out of his system. And she was a little curious about it as well. “It’ll all be for fun, once it’s over, it’s over, we won’t see her again.”

  “You’re crazy you know that? Just crazy!”

  “I’m just trying to keep everything fresh, can’t you understand?”

  “Nope,” Sierra said with a finality that let Barrett know that no matter what she said, Sierra wasn’t going to change her mind.

  Barrett tightened her lips. “So it’s pretty hot out today, huh?”

  Hours later Barrett was sitting at her desk with her laptop open, surfing the net. She didn’t have a clue on how to find a third person for her planned threesome. Time was running out, Tavis’ birthday was next week.

  She glanced out through her glass door, everyone was busy. They had a big case coming up and it was going to trial on Monday and most of the staff was assigned to it, and so was she, she was the lead attorney, but she had more pressing matters to worry about, like finding a lover.

  “How the hell am I going to find a lady for our threesome? It’s not like I can ask any of my friends,” she muttered, thinking back to her conversation with Sierra. “That had been a mistake.” Sierra had sent her an e-mail expounding the evils of a ménage a trois. After skimming it, she had chuckled to herself then erased it, she and Tavis weren’t going to have any of those problems.

  Moments later she sighed and focused on her work and didn’t pull away until her shoulders were burning. Normally she’d shrug it off and work right through it, but today she needed a break. She grabbed her Coach bag from her desk drawer and made her way to the cafeteria. After getting a cup of coffee and a cupcake, the snack of champions, she was back at her desk, eating and working.

  Barrett was bent over her desk, poring over law books, when there was a knock on her door. She looked up to find LaTonya, the mail clerk, holding a certified letter.

  “Hey Ms. McKenzie can you sign this? The receptionist isn’t at her desk.”

  “Sure.” Barrett took the pen and signed the form. “Just leave it on her desk,” she instructed.

  “Sure will. Thanks.”

  Barrett watched LaTonya as she sauntered to the office door, her work uniform of a navy blue polo and khakis, did little to contain her curves. LaTonya had a reputation around the firm as a partyer and a slut, not necessarily in that order. Barrett heard that she had slept with most of the male lawyers and a few of the females. I bet she would know where I could find a willing partner. Barrett called to her.

  LaTonya turned around, a frown furrowing her brow as she braced herself to be reprimanded, she wasn’t sure for what, but LaTonya learned that people always found something to complain about. “Yes Ms. McKenzie?”

  Barrett suddenly froze, unsure of how to phrase her question without LaTonya figuring out that it was for her. “Um, I hate to bother you…but I have an unusual question.”

  The frown eased from LaTonya’s face and she relaxed, she wasn’t in trouble; at least not with Ms. McKenzie.

  Barrett continued, carefully picking her words, “I have a friend who wants to spice up her marriage and she would like a special gift for her husband.”

  LaTonya patiently listened, sensing that a solution wasn’t needed just yet, there was more to come, she was correct.

  Barrett’s gaze slid sideways then returned to LaTonya before resuming, “She would like to give him a lady.”

  LaTonya’s eyes widened. “You mean like a prostitute?”

  “No! At least I don’t think so,” Barrett said a little flustered. “She wants a lady who would be willing to have a threesome with them. They don’t need a prostitute for that do they?”

  LaTonya grinned brightly. “Okay, I see what you’re saying. Cool, I didn’t know you had freaks for friends Ms. McKenzie.”

  Barrett bristled. “They aren’t freaks, they’re just looking for something different. A little fun,” she said defensively.

  “Oh, okay sorry,” LaTonya said confused by Barrett’s tone. She was only making an observation on how she saw the situation.

  “You’re fine,” Barrett said, embarrassed by her attitude. “I’m sorry, they’re good people. Anyway,” she resumed, while smiling tightly, “do you have any suggestions?”

  “Sure, that’s easy. They can try girlsliketohavefun.com, or 3scompany.com or post an ad on brandislist.com. I kinda like brandislist, because it’s free. You have to pay for the other two.” Barrett raised her eyebrows at LaTonya’s knowledge. She shrugged in response. “Hey, don’t judge, I ain’t a saint. I like to have fun.”

  “I’m not judging, really I’m not. Hey thanks for the information I really appreciate it.”

  “No problem. I hope your friends find what they are looking for,” LaTonya said then sauntered out the door.

  Barrett sipped her wine and set it aside. Since Tavis was working late she was taking advantage of her free time and was looking for their threesome partner. Instead of creating an ad, she decided to review existing postings and she began second guessing her decision. “These people sure are bold and some are just plain old nasty,” she decided. After clicking on a dozen links at brandislist.com she had seen so many close-ups of women crotches and breasts that she was nauseated.

  Twenty minutes later a profile caught her eye. It was the picture that made her pause. The lady had her wavy hair blowing behind
her, like a blanket of black silk, with a white sheet covering her breasts, the shot was demure and sexy at the same time. It was the eyes that drew her in, they were staring boldly at the camera, but Barrett could easily imagine her casting them shyly away.

  Her eyes lingered on the picture for a moment before moving to the profile. Barrett skimmed her bio, she was twenty-five, with a bachelor’s degree, five eight and bi-lingual, with her being fluent in Spanish.

  “She’s it,” Barrett breathed, unable to take her eyes off the picture.

  The Return of Wifey - $1.99

  Barrett McKenzie pushed the shopping cart through the grocery store, it was eight o’clock on a Friday evening, the worst time of the week for her to shop. The grocery store was filled with single people hoping to find something to squeeze in the produce department that didn’t spoil in fourteen days, people running in to get last minute items for dinner and families like herself who always forgot about the Friday evening crowd and think that they could run in and out in ten minutes. Three years ago, she would’ve been in and out so fast that she would’ve left skid marks. But no more, her two-year-old, daughter, Kelsey, and six-month-old, son, Tavis Junior, T.J., changed all that.

  Barrett had made the mistake of going down the aisle with the miniscule toy section, however; no matter how small, her daughter found it and picked up a Hot Wheels car.

  “Put it down,” Barrett said softly. But instead of returning it to the shelf, Kelsey got down on her hands and knees and began pushing the car on the dirty floor. Barrett’s grip tightened on the nylon strap wrapped around her hand. “Come on Kelsey. We need to finish shopping.”

  Kelsey looked over her shoulder at her mom. “No!”

  “Put it down Kelsey,” Barrett murmured. Her daughter ignored her and continued playing. Barrett tugged discreetly on the leash that was attached to a harness buckled around her daughter’s torso. She didn’t want to draw too much attention to them; she had already gotten the usual looks from other shoppers. People pointed and giggled at her, some scowled and made her feel like she was treating her daughter like a disobedient puppy. She had seen it all.